I need OUT of this place!!!

I am so ready to move. I want to get the heck out of dodge. I have lived in this place my whole life. Part of me wants to get out and explore. I feel like my heart is telling me to go somewhere else.


What keeps me here you may ask? My family. Mainly my grandmother and my sister. It seems that ever since my mom died I have been the one to keep the family going. I am the one to read and explain everything, give my opinion on what should be done, etc. My grandmother is not leaving this town. I made mention to her that she should move to her home town with her sister. My aunt is now living alone since their mother, my great grandmother died about 2 years ago. She says that she wishes that she could. Maybe the fact that my mother is buried here, is keeping her here. This is so hard for me because my heart longs for another place. I feel trapped. And another issue that I may have to move after I am finished with school due to lack of teaching jobs.

I am so conflicted when thinking about this because it seems like a wish that won’t happen. I am afraid to pray for relocation because I do not see how this can happen without something happening to my family.

I am supposed to be making a plan anyway but I just cannot get started without becoming very overwhelmed.

SIGH

I just needed to get this out.